Three more chapters got done. Some of this was tough going. Scenes at first flew by, striking me as strong and resonating, and then later, after some reflection, as terrible. So in the evening, I went at them again, almost rewriting one chapter, reshaping a character’s motivations from empathetic to angered to withered. After five or six rereadings, it finally felt right. I’ll have to reread again tomorrow, with fresh emotions and new eyes, to have a better opinion.
The other two chapters went smoother, but also had similar issues if more minor. I am at times confident and at other times despondent with the story. Daron’s story still seems more solid, but then revenge stories are, much like a blues song is solid. Aubrey, in the initial draft, is all over the place, and I am having to drag her back into something more focused, but not seething as Daron. The initial trauma has to remain important and driving, but it is critical her empathy grows from it.
Wrote a ton of words today, almost 3,000. That’s crazy. This is during revision! I was a frenzy during the redux of that one chapter. Unbelievable.
I wish I had more time to focus on writing. Daily life, work, petty bullshit takes me away from this story. I know it’s only a story, something that in the end will likely be unimportant to anyone but me. But right now it is important to me, my secret, this world that I am pouring my essence into. I wish I could focus on it, give these people, these characters, the attention they deserve. I realize that is the crazy talk of a writer, but fuck it. It’s what I am.
Words written today: 2,910
Total for 2017: 36,043
Revision today: 3 chapters
Revision total: 21 chapters
Total words for this manuscript: 113,681 (+5,518)